Yoli Tamu, Mother-Daughter Bonding Strategist

Don’t Bother Me, I Can’t Cope

“Resilience is all about being able to overcome the unexpected. Sustainability is about survival. The goal of resilience is to THRIVE.” – Jamais Cascio

Don’t Bother Me, I Can’t Cope” was not only a powerful Broadway musical about the experiences of African Americans at that time, but it has proven to be a relevant title for so many culturally diverse people today. How many adults and teenagers in your life find it hard to cope these days?

Young people, in particular, find it difficult to cope with making their own decisions and dealing with the daily pressures that follow them around in their heads. Does your daughter find it easy or difficult to look on the ‘bright side’ of things or is she easily drawn to the ‘dark side’?

The misuse of drugs and alcohol, along with some cyber bullying and sexual experimentation can all be signs that your teen is trying to cope. She may be trying to understand just who she is and how she fits into a world full of so many distractions and oftentimes disappointment.

Your connection with your daughter builds up her resilience to deal with the world. In fact, her resilience is the key to a successful life of joy and fulfillment. When your daughter is able to feel safe with the knowledge that she can count on you, mentors/teachers and a positive community to refuel her mind and soul, she can overcome many of life’s disappointments and face life’s obstacles head on. She will know she has support and can therefore survive test of time..

It truly takes a village to raise a child.

So, how do you connect with your daughter!

When do you make time for the two of you to hang out and get to know one another?

How many mentors/teachers are influencing your daughter?

Are you sure she has a positive network of supportive peers around her?

If your answer is ‘Yes’, ‘Congratulations!’ Your daughter is on her way to a building a life of resilience AND personal acceptance. If your answer is ‘No’, take time this week to observe the social connections around your daughter and ask yourself if it’s time to reconnect in a different way.

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